Note: The story I promised in my previous post is delayed for another day or two - proprietorial reasons. ;)

The taxi driver who drove me to the studio where I was interviewed for Canada AM * had the radio tuned to a satire show. In an exaggerated Tel Aviv clubbers' drawl, participants were issuing mock instructions to the city's residents in case the hundreds of missiles currently landing daily all over the north of the country reach the centre, as Nasrallah keeps promising. "If you're told to take shelter, that means immediately. Do not stop for an espresso at Aroma or an almond croissant at Arcaffe. Immediately." Or, "In case of an attack, you must prepare yourselves for the worst possible scenario - the cancellation of the Depeche Mode concert." And, "If a missile falls on your neighbour's car, run fast and maybe you'll get his parking spot." Mwahaha.

We do have a tendency to make dark jokes and satire when we're under stress. Just before the coalition forces invaded Iraq in 2003, when there were concerns that chemical warheads might be launched by Saddam Hussein at Israel, I heard a couple of gas chamber jokes (all these Jews gathered in one place). And yes, we are under stress. Basically, we don't really expect to be attacked - but then again, you never know. We never thought that Haifa would be attacked, either - until it happened. On the one hand I've noticed that strangers are gentler with one another in face-to-face interactions, but on the other hand the drivers are even more maniacal and aggressive than ever: today I saw two drivers executing death-defying U-turns on North Dizengoff during peak rush hour traffic, and there seems to be a lot more overtaking and honking than usual.

This morning a couple of Chinese reporters interviewed me for a pre-recorded radio show at my local cafe. Our waiter, Ido, is a gentle, perpetually smiling, slightly clumsy guy in his mid-twenties who wears his wild, curly hair pulled away from his face with a headband and shuffles around in sagging jeans and Birkenstocks. At one point he told me that he'd just received an emergency call-up notice for army reserve duty; when I translated this into English for the Chinese reporters, one of them looked at Ido with an amazed, "does not compute" look and said to me, "But he looks so normal! He's going to put on a uniform and...kill?" I really balked at that word, I must confess. Hmm, I thought, welcome to my world of cognitive dissonance.

So, as part of my ongoing mission to conquer the international media, I was interviewed for three radio shows, one television show and three newspaper articles today. Since this is unpaid work, I'm thinking I  should apply to the Zionist cabal for some kind of a retainer.

And now, since it is, um, 4.00 a.m. (cripes! how did it get so late?) and I have to get up early in the morning, I'll save the rest for later.

Just one last thing, though: Quite a few very thoughtful people have taken the time to write me some absolutely beautiful, warm and generous emails. I haven't had time to respond to most of them yet, but I will very soon. Meanwhile, I just want to let you know how much I appreciate your kindness and encouragement.


*I think the link's only good today until about 3.30 p.m. Israel time, 8.30 a.m. Toronto time. UPDATE: Nope, it's still there.